The Thrive Movie has received an overwhelming response. For most of us when we re in relationship it feels like we re on solid ground. Recently a relationship with a man I loved ended. It was his call not mine. To our credit it ended with love and respect. Yes we had felt some pebbles showing up on our path together. But his decision to end the relationship knocked me off my feet and into the void. This is when the emotional rollercoaster goes on overdrive. Living in the void is a critical time to really dance and flow with our feelings. My own loss of relationship reminds me how powerful our emotions are. I was reminded of one of my children s favorite stories when they were young. It was about a family going on a bear hunt. Along their way they encountered obstacles like a swampy marsh or dark forest. There is discomfort in the void often bordering on pain. Literally our hearts ache. It seethes with anger. It curls up in despair. Yet it s so impor! tant to take time in this vacuum. Recently one of my children developed an infection. It stubbornly grew into a swollen painful abscess below the skin. It was the release the doctor and I were hoping for but it was nonetheless painful. Yet to complete the healing process for my child it wasn t enough. The doctor had to make a small incision in the seeping wound to make it bigger. Each day I feel my heart growing stronger more able to love myself and others. When you feel a whisper of strong emotions starting to come up make sure you take deep conscious breaths. Shallow breathing doesn t allow sufficient oxygen to come into the body and creates stress. A journal is a safe place to collect all of those internal thoughts and feelings that must be released. I would even argue that life in the void requires a journal. There are no rights and wrongs about how to journal properly. That s just the ego mind squawking. Just give journaling a try. The Medicine of Music Mu! sic is a powerful tool to explore and help you release emotion. Celebrate Your Tears Yes this is the time for tears. No need to bottle them up or keep a stiff upper lip. Talk it out with a friend or out loud to yourself and enjoy a good cry. I am training with renowned relationship expert and author Dr. Barbara De Angelis and she offered a beautiful analogy for feelings. She explains that feelings flow like water. The tears we shed when we release our emotions are simply the ice around our hearts melting. Give Yourself Time Break ups are painful and people struggle to dodge that pain. We can t be too quick to heal the wound and need time to heal from the inside out.
Source: http://www.thriveafterdivorceblog.com/2008/01/17/relationship-break-up-living-in-the-void-part-1/
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